ClemenceDane
2 min readJul 9, 2019

--

“(E)xhibiting traditional “girls” preferences for toys, characters, colors, playmates, clothing, accessories, hair styles, shoes, stories, etc. This child may simultaneously reject any and everything traditionally “boy” related…

That part was my child. Couldn’t get enough of Disney princess movies, princess costumes, play makeup, plastic high heels, My Little Ponies, jewelry, baby dolls, Barbies, Polly Pockets– basically anything sparkly, glittery, pink, purple, pouffy, or otherwise screaming “GIRL!” But if you gave this same child a brand new, shiny red fire truck with all the bells and whistles, or even a basic Lego set in primary colors, it would never even make it out of the box.”

I’m going to comment on this in the context of the larger discussion it raises, as it would be inappropriate for me to comment on your child’s personal situation. I don’t know you or them and the societal questions raised are really what interest me and spur me to debate.

So, I still see the description above as a rejection of society’s artificial gender constructs, not an indication that a boy is really a girl, mostly because I don’t think these things make a girl a girl either. If they did, I would not have been considered a girl. This is just what U.S. society has decided makes a girl.

As a child, I disliked all of the things in the list from Disney princess movies to “sparkly” and “pouffy.” And yet I have always been a girl.

Why can’t we expand the definition of “boy” to allow pink (Elvis), purple (Prince), softness (James Taylor), grace (Baryshnikov), poise (Fred Astaire), dolls (Yves Saint Laurent), sensitivity (Mr. Rogers), glitter (Michael Jackson), just as we’ve expanded “girl” to allow trucks, tree-climbing, pants, leadership, Legos, confidence, and machine guns (something I had and loved at age 7)?

“…(T)ransitioning, which typically involves growing hair long or cutting it short, dressing in the expected clothing of their authentic gender…”

So it means ditching one set of society’s binary gender expectations and adopting the other one?

--

--

ClemenceDane

Linguist, philosopher, lover of history, wordhound, 21 year New Yorker, searching for meaning in the universe