I’d like to know what his text messages to her were like. That would tell me more about her motivations in encouraging him to go through with it. If she’s a Christian believer and truly thought he would go to heaven, and if he was telling her that he was in non-stop, excruciating agony every minute, I could see what she did as compassionate, if misguided.
I agree about seeing tears as purely manipulative. That is something that truly enrages me when people say it. As if every woman can simply conjure tears from nowhere at the drop of a hat, solely to manipulative someone. I say this as someone who has trouble crying even when I am feeling intense grief. Believe me, on those rare occasions when I cry it’s because the emotion has completely overwhelmed me, and I could no more control it than I do the weather.